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| i have a lot of respect for individuals who are dead-set on who they are as a person. and for those who can hold their own and not care what people think, i am filled with envy.
me? chances are if you're reading this blog, i live for your approval. please like me. 
------------------------------------------------ life aspirations. again....
it's not as if i was dissatisfied with my progress thus far, i am simply so overwhelmed by all the desires in my life, its become increasingly difficult to live in the present and NOT focus on .... hmm.. taking over the world? is it so wrong to actually find woman like melinda gates .. or even hillary clinton absolutely fascinating? how about ben shalom bernanke?! [oh. he's not a female  ... doesnt matter. go ben go!]
aside from the rather 'large' aspirations, i feel my life splitting again. i haven't felt this way since sophomore year where the duality literally wiped me out, and i was forced to hold a falling out party with my Christian nature- bidding adieu and breaking off our relationship, i could two-time no more.
there are so many life issues that are currently in conflict with one another, the partiality im forcing upon myself is making me into a really second-rate person. (not to mention flaky, which is just an annoying attribute to have). i'm so tired of thinking about the fall/ugliness of humanity, and the paralleled grace of Christ, and the mediocre/complacent lifestyle devoid of any real living. have i honestly spent the past however many years, gaining society's approval?
[friends and family, please dont take insult to this trite statement]. everything is so superficial. i wish i could at least say i was passionate about living superficially, but alas, i can't seem to do anything whole-heartedly.
more growing pains i suppose. -----------------------------------------
........ so i just got off the phone with my parents. my mom just called me a chronic complainer. hah. damn. time to get my act together. time to listen to some carpenters. anybody up for taking a fin mgmt course w/ me?
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|
 
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| I took some time
this morning to run through my old xanga entries. Yeap, this one . Why? Having
already previously subscribed to a friend's site via sensazn88, I had to
stumble back into 2005 to read about her Chapter 11 story. [Oh, I just gave her
away! - Speaking of which, said friend in above sentence, can you please take
away your RSS Feed Locking Setting?]
Moving on, I
noticed that sometime between 2005 and 2008, the 'witty banter' that was evident
in my old writings have been replaced with some rather mundane, content-lacking
garbage. Don't get me wrong; I realize my literary skills were always on
the subpar end. The articulate gene went to my fruitcake of a brother. I'm
jealous.
So naturally,
being the pseudo-masochist that I am, I started the drawn out process on what
went wrong. Self-analysis 101. What was it? Lack of practice? God knows it
couldn't be lack of reading since I don't read anymore than before! Actually,
on the contrary, I think I read MORE now... even if it's the wedding section of
the nytimes. (That totally counts right?) Perhaps it's simply a lack of
subjects or topics? Living with
Jen/Steph/Esther did always provide ample things to write about. My newly minted
roommates now consist of my brother and my dust bunnies, both of which are grey
and slightly dreary with a garnish of weird.
.... There is
also the finally turning 21 ordeal. Becoming 'legal' has left some gaps in
my memory... only some. Maybe the damsel in distress phase has finally passed,
and I no longer feel the need to write about being fed to the wolves. Rightttttttttt,
who am I kidding. Let's face it, I'm boring now.
Sigh. I'm out of
ideas. I'll take 'lack of practice' and run with it. Having said that, I'll try
to blog more often. Maybe I can even get my subpar mojo back? | | |
| back by popular demand. this xanga has revived itself. (DONT EXPECT THINGS GREG)
its been a while. take it from someone who usually has writer's block, i have nothing to report. i want to say a crapload has changed in 2 years (was it one or two?).. it hasnt. congratulations are in order perhaps because i finally graduated. yay to the girl who wanted to stay in school forever!!. was i seriously proposing three majors? The dean kicked me out of undergrad, so i did the next thing feasible.... i enrolled in grad school, but everyone knows that already. 3 weeks in i realize i hate math. blasphemy!! i know. i breathe math, i live for math, i love math. i'll grow out of this phase for sure.
so... what's the latest news? surely NO BLOG IS RIGHT WITHOUT PICTURES. so here it goes. i am a 22-yo homeowner. .. repeat... twenty-two years old. my dad calls it his "enforced savings plan". i call it sadism, but as many of you are already aware of my situation, this is really a blessing in disguise. nomad no more!. my parents put down a crapload of money to buy me and my brother a place by the riverfront facing midtown. every night i get a breathtaking view of the city.
and with it, comes increased anxieties as i pay off my breathtakingly large mortgage and think about my future plans.
some things havent changed though. for one, taking a page from grad school, one really needs to just relax to a glass of wine. riedel wine glasses filled with a chilean riesling that i bought the other day and enjoying with john legend playing in the background. if anyone is wondering why im drinking a white, in my defense, it's just been awfully hot outside and i thought a chilled white might be more appropriate. not bad. disregard my completely useless macbook.
a few people have been dying to see the 'new place'. i know my brother and i have been hesitant to show it because it lacks any type of furniture possible, but here are a few spoiler photos until you are legitimately invited to my ultimate bachelor pad. yes that is a Isamu Noguchi cofee table. matt bought it a while back. to be exact it was when we were still signing our lives away to citimortgage. ... btw i drive a volvo now? bring on the husband, kids, and soccer balls.
so here's a shot at the kitchen that everyone's been asking about. biggest disappointment has to be that all the jenn-air utilities are electric . apparently we have the upgraded version in the development. that really doesnt entice me to cook any more though. sad right?
the best housewarming gifts? the kuerig k-cup coffee maker that i make use of everyday (yay for coffee!), as well as the kitchaid artisan stand mixer that i have yet to make use of. repeat: most awesome gift ever (.. if by chance low bang is reading this, then the kuerig coffee maker stands superior). i promise to make at least cupcakes. its been a sad half decade in the chapter of me cooking. outside of marinating beef, i wont touch anything. ironic considering i really wanted to go to culinary school?. moving on.
so everything is pretty much the same... with exception of course to the fact that instead of being in school, i'm now on salary. i still want to conquer the world. i still havent closed the door on a medical career. i still rock in genetics. i still love to sleep.
and to finish. i dedicate this blog to greg wong!! i'll be back in another year or two.
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| Forecast for Hong Kong, China
10-Day Forecast
NEW: Faster Radar Maps & No Ads
High /
Low (°F) Precip. %
Today
May 22 Scattered T-Storms 84°/80° 60 %
Wed
May 23 Scattered T-Storms / Wind 87°/80° 60 %
Thu
May 24 Scattered T-Storms 87°/80° 60 %
Fri
May 25 Scattered T-Storms 86°/79° 60 %
Sat
May 26 Scattered T-Storms 86°/78° 60 %
Sun
May 27 Scattered T-Storms 87°/78° 60 %
Mon
May 28 Scattered T-Storms 86°/79° 60 %
Tue
May 29 Scattered T-Storms 85°/79° 60 %
Wed
May 30 Scattered T-Storms 86°/79° 60 %
Thu
May 31 Scattered T-Storms 87°/79° 60 %
Last Updated May 22 01:19 p.m. Local Time | | |
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